Curly Suicide

Curly Suicide (born in San Jose, Costa Rica but the exact year and location are a much debated topic) moved at a very young age to Darkest Tasmania. Her well publicized love for eating small animals sprang from these tender years when she first was exposed to marsupials. Quickly her innocent experimentations with marsupialism took Curly down a bad path that was made much worse when she was introduced to Tasmanian devils: having much in common with the animals, including an eerie growl (which starts as a kind of whistle and ends in a bark) a foul temper and extraordinary strong jaws.

Around the age of 10 Curly was kidnapped by Shaghai pirates who planned to sell her signature blonde hair for various purposes including hair extensions and designer toothbrushes in Japan. Not much is known about her pirate years, but wild stories are in circulation and rumors abound. The most well recognized and researched tales say she escaped from the pirates (with her hair intact) and moved around the globe bouncing from one life threatening situation to another, including underground no holds bar arm wrestling rings and seal fights.

She finally found herself in Austin, TX. She was drawn to a city with a high level of gun ownership and a high opportunity for drive by's. During a scrap with the law that was brought on by a bout of rage (later diagnosed as a symptom of FMS, a disorder that affects extremely short people resulting in quick fiery reactions and super human strength.) the situation became so out of control that all 17 of the reporting officers used their tazers on her for a total of 37 consecutive minutes. Many years later she has been heard joking that she intentionally provoked the tazing in order to get her hair curled, which eventually led to her name.

Following a lengthy trial, a judge recognized that the combination of Curly's abilities could lead her to the path of Roller Derby greatness. So as part of her rehabilitation she is required to vent all her fury on her derby opponents.