Honey Homicide #187

Making Bodies Drop Since 2004

Number: One Eight Seven
Position: Blocker
Likes: straight bourbon, full clips, cold steel
Dislikes: laws and those who enforce them
Motto: “Shoot to Kill”

Honey Homicide was reared a Southern lady, but she never had much use for it. She spiked the punch at Cotillion with codeine cough syrup and ditched her junior prom to go to a biker rally. Her parents stopped making her go to Mass after she fogged out a Confessional. For her Sweet Sixteen, her father gave her a .45 for protection. Things kind of went downhill from there.

At her debutante ball, she pulled a knife on her escort for talking dirty to a lady. She was expelled from law school for her utter refusal to obey the automatic weapons ordinance. Upon her father's death, she inherited his entire estate and burned the house in River Oaks to the ground with her mother in it. After that, it's anybody's guess what she was up to.

She’s just the nicest girl, but don’t let that sweet smile fool you. Rumor has it Honey shot a man in Mexico for spilling her drink. A few days after an altercation with a woman in a bar in New Orleans, the police found her body in the bayou. A beautiful floral arrangement was sent to the funeral with an unsigned card that read, “I bet calling me a bitch will be a lot more difficult in Hell.” Seven murder charges later (and acquitted on every one), Honey decided it was time for a change of pace. She relocated to Monterrey and laid low until a slight misunderstanding over a game of craps turned into a bloodbath. Cash in hand, she lit out for Texas and ended up in Austin, and the rest, as they say, is history. Nowadays, she can be seen destroying for the Cherry Bombs and riding around town in a drop-top 'Lac with her .45 at her side. If you see her, don't say hello.

When she’s not killing or skating in the derby, Miss Homicide teaches Etiquette courses at The Classy Lady Charm and Beauty School.